"Lawyer: An individual whose principal role is to protect his clients from others of his profession."-Anonymous

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Drunk for Sentencing!

So now...What kind of mental thought process must one go through to think...

"Hmm, the sun is shining outside you know and since I just got out of custody last week, after serving 49 plus days in
By Golly, Today is my lucky day!!...I think it might be a good idea to show up to court drunk for my sentencing!"
"Oh, but wait...I certainly can't be late for my sentencing...I think I'll show up a good 20 minutes EARLY so that the deputies and every one else gets a good whiff of the alcohol permeating out of every skin cell of my being!"

Yes folks, that's how my afternoon kicked off, my client (I actually really like the guy)... in spite of the temporary lapse in judgment and added aroma that one could not possibly ignore within a good yard of him.

Mr. John Doe was actually in my opinion, quite lucid. He didn't display any of the "typical signs of intoxication" whatsoever...just the odor.

Although I knew and advised him that it was extremely likely that he'd be going to jail, especially after the PO (Probation Officer) insisted that he take a breathalyzer right on the spot. He was actually nonchalant, smiling and seemingly care free throughout the whole ordeal.

I, the brilliant PD that I am, made a valiant attempt to persuade the Judge not to order a Breathalyzer test as he was perfectly lucid, understood the recommendations and was quite agreeable to following them. I mean, my client is here...he served his time, complied with the interim court orders and even showed up early!

Besides, the terms of his release and plea agreement pending sentencing didnt particulary say he couldn't show up to court drunk... Disclaimer: Now, I didn't actually SAY the preceding line...but I sure as heck thought it!

Needless to say...as it turns out...I'm not that brilliant after all (Damn)... No dice.

So not only does my client blow a .18 the first try...(mind you the legal limit in my jurisdiction is a .08)...the PO turns to me and states..."should we do another one?"

I mean what the heck...it can't get any worse right??

"Might as well"...I mutter.

'Oh but yes Virginia, it can!....

second time?


Good thing my client is indigent and doesn't drive

...And off he goes...back to jail


Saxon_Cori said...

I once had a client show up to DUI court wearing a Budweiser T shirt, smelling of alcohol, and would you believe this, with an open, half-full can in pocket.

It's moments like that that make low salary worthwhile...

The Bardd

public defender said...

My judge will give my clients one warning if they show up boozie. He tells them that he's going to send them home (as long as they didn't drive), and next time they need to show up sober.

When they show up the second time the breath test is there waiting for them, and if there is any BAC it's off to jail they go.

Also, you can ask the judge to set bond if he's ordering them into custody.

Can I go home now?? said...


I seriously could not stop laughing after reading that! I mean you just can't make this stuff up! Sometimes the job just utterly amazes me! ;)


Sounds like you got a good judge! Unfortunately my guy sat for the 49 days because he couldn't post the $50 cash alternative bond in the first place.

Saxon_Cori said...

And why is it that when you or a cop questions the client about alcohol use, the client always claims he had "2 beers"? Have you noticed that? Not a six-pack, not the shots that followed the beers, not the weed that he smoked before the beer?

"How much did you drink?"

"Uh... I had 2 beers, ok?"

And all the while, you have to stand 6 feet away from him/her, minimum, else you risk getting drunk yourself from the fumes.

I love this job...

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okanogan county lawyer said...

When my clients show up like this, I wonder to myself if they are oblivious too how strong the odor is.

HcoRealEstate said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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